Healing

I was randomly thinking about how long it takes me to heal after surgery. Every time, it took my body three days to heal and by the fourth day I was well. I’ve also noticed that when something I feel is bad occurs in my life, it has the same healing time as something physical.

Day 1: After I come from surgery, I know something within my body has changed, but I feel no pain because I’m still hung over from the anesthesia. My pain is numb.

When I get the news about the incident, I’m usually in subtle shock. I can’t believe what has happened, but then again I can. I tend to go on about the day like nothing has happening; I am numb to the consequences.

Day 2: When I wake up and try to move, I feel the pain shooting through my body. I have the choice to take my pain meds, or bear through it. I know that I’m not well and I basically have open incisions that need to heal. And if I try to push myself too far, I can damage something or bleed unnecessarily.

After waking up, I realize that I must face my consequences; that’s when I’m either angry or moping around. I have the choice of participating in retail therapy, or bearing through it knowing that I shouldn’t be spending unnecessary money. This is the day when I start to think about the whole incident and I realize I really can’t do anything to change what has happened. I’m very unproductive during the day.

Day 3: I try to move around, and I do get far, but not far enough to reach my destination without feeling the pain slowly coming back. I realize that my incisions are indeed healing, but they still need a little more time.

At this point I’ve realized that it’s going to be what it’s going to be. I think I’m fine and can continue my life as the incident never occur, but little things start to remind me of the incident and I get taken aback. It could be something as simple as seeing a post/tweet from the person involved in the incident, a picture of them that I stumble across, a song on the radio, an episode on TV, etc.

Day 4: I’M FINE!!!!! 😀

Why is it this way? I have no idea but I recognize the pattern and I’m okay with it.